MERRY CHRISTMAS FROM THE
INCREDIPOWELLS 7: Parents of Anarchy
It is that time of year again to fill you in on the shamrocks and shenanigans of the IncrediPowells over the last year. The last year has flown by and I hope to bring you just a snippet of what the chaotic life is like in a female dominated household. So, lets see how the last year has unfolded for the resident thugs of the Sherrylynn Hood.
Emmerson is 5 and still holds the title belt at being the most difficult child ever...of all time….on the face of earth. With that being said, she is also probably the biggest comedian of the 3, so I guess we will give her kudos for that. I mean shouldn’t every 5 year old be able to repeat the beginning of “Baby Got Back” at a moments notice? Emmy was also the first of our kids to have a broken bone, when she snapped her forearm after somersaulting down the slide at Chick-fil-A. Having a cast however did not slow her down a bit, she got it around 11 pm and was playing soccer at noon the next day. This was her first season in soccer and it turned out to be a good one. Her team finished undefeated and she probably scored about 50 goals, which is not bad for an 8 game season. This is also her first year in dance and she is dying to be just like Addison…..God help me.
Ellie will be 7 in January and continues to be the calm amongst the storm, most of the time. She is in 1st grade this year and has the meanest teacher at Four Mile Elementary, Mrs. Moore. She is a good student and really enjoys school, which just seems to further the question of who does she really belong to. This was her 3rd season in soccer and she moved up to U8 this year which is where the teams are no longer co-ed, which Ellie seemed to think was not as fun…...uh oh. While she is not quite the prolific goal scorer that Emmy is, her team also finished the season undefeated, probably the coaching, and she continued to be mostly worried about who was bringing the post game treats that week. Ellie is also back in the dance game after realizing that she was the only one not taking dance lessons and absolutely loves class with Uncle Richard.
Addison is 10 and continues to suck the life out of us and our wallets. Pretty much any free time that we have is spent chauffeuring her around West Des Moines from this dance lesson to that dance lesson. Along with her solo, duet, jazz, hip hop, and pom routines this year, she has added a small group lyrical to the schedule. This is her favorite routine to perform, and mine also because it is the easiest to make fun of. If you are not familiar with this style of dance, think of an over dramatic soap opera (yes, I said over dramatic) set to dance. Someday the other 2 will be able to look back on the fun that they had growing up in the van in dance studio parking lots. Addison is in 5th grade this year and says she has the coolest teacher at Four Mile, Mr. Kayser. That also means that they switch rooms for different subjects and that once a day, she has to go to the dreaded Mrs. Powell’s room…..da da da dummmm.
Kim is in her eleventh year of teaching 5th grade at Four Mile Elementary, and her second year of being half of the self proclaimed Sherrylynn Hood flippy cup champions. This year also marked a couple of milestones for Kim. The first of which was her induction into the Simpson College Hall of Fame for her achievements in softball. This has also netted her the nickname “The HOF” in the neighborhood, which ironically is the same thing she requires me to call her at home. Secondly, this November Kim turned 40, which means she is pretty much circling the drain. For her birthday a few of the Sherrylynn Hoodies and Kim took a much needed (LOL) trip to Clearwater, FL or as one neighbor called it, a bachelorette party. On the trip they perfected the use of the selfie stick (Google it), which has quickly become a favorite in our household. Other than Addison’s first dance competition of the year, this was the most relaxing 5 days I have had in a long time.
This January I will be starting my fourth year at Titan Tire and the last half of my last year of being daddy daycare. According to Kim, next school year will be the first time she has a full time housekeeper ….I don’t get it? This past summer I tried my hand at fastpitch softball and it turns out that my extracurricular “athletic” activities may also be circling the drain, next year it may have to consist of walking the dogs, that’s right, dogs plural. This past year after 13 great years we lost Katara and apparently it takes two dogs to replace her. We now have Schumi, which is the male dog equivalent to Emmerson, and Roxy who is the female mirror image of Yellow Dog on the movie Funny Farm. They couldn’t be more polar opposites, but don’t worry, Roxy can hold her own when it comes to putting up with Schumi’s BS. I also coached Emmy and assistant coached Ellie in soccer this fall and as their records indicated, I am pretty good…..or they had great teammates, you can be the judge. During a close and frustrating finale to Ellie’s season Kim had to remind me that they were not professionals and I needed to shut up…..apparently she thinks she is some sort of assistant coach.
We hope this letter finds you and yours doing well this Christmas season. We wish you all the best in 2015 and we hope to see you soon…….We Accept That!
KC, Kim, Addison, Ellie, Emmerson, Schumi and Roxy IncrediPowell.